Feeling Afraid

Sigh~

I'm afraid...

Afraid of the future.

Afraid that I might not live the way I wanted to live my life.

Afraid that I might not succed in realising my dreams.

(Though there's one dream that I couldn't realise but I have other dreams too)

Afraid that I would end up hating my life.

I should believe in myself but...

I'm not completely sure what I'm going to do with my life.

Well, there are things that I know I want to do

but I don't what job I should have.

I always act like I don't care much about the

things happening around me.

I was young an naive then but as i grow up

I become scared.

Life can be really scary.

How can I survive this?

I also realise that not all dreams can come true.

Yeah, Disney channel always tells us that dreams do come true.

I'm not saying that dreams don't come true.

I'm just saying that they don't always come true.

Again with this drem talk, Farah?

Come on, move on!!!

Sheesh!!

I remember that time when I went to Jusco with my mom.

I saw this lady holding her child

(well I think she was holding a child or was the child in the trolly?)

(ok, did I spell "trolly" correctly? Not sure with the spelling)

and a thought came to mind.

I thought that I didn't want to be like her.

Living like that.

Don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't want to have

a child of my of own.

I do but later in the future.

It's just that I don't want to live a boring and dull life.

The woman didn't even seem happy when I saw her.

I don't want to end up with no career and holding my child

at a mall with a sad expression on my face.

I mean what kind of life is that?

I'm not saying that the woman I saw was living this kind of life.

I don't even know her.

She was just a stranger that I was destined to meet.

Our paths was destined to intertwine.

Hahaha~

What am I saying?

Anyway, life has become really scary for me

but I know that pain and endurance helps me grow.

(Got that from "Master of Study. The korean version of course)

(Man, that drama ROCKs!!!)

Aaaaanyway, I hope things will go well in the future.

I REALLY hope so.

Pray for me, please.